A stylized lineart third eye symbol surrounded by symmetrical orbs and teardrop shaped stones >

Davinia: Welcome once again to the Everseen Sanctum and to another episode of Questgiver! In this episode our contestants will get to see the enchanted Gloaming Esoterica and be offered the opportunity to use Krudge's Sack of Desperation. One's an eerily beautiful repository of arcane knowledge and the other is a portal to all the useless shit you could want. Can you guess which one is which? (In singsong) I bet you can't!

Will our contestants be repositories of knowledge or just full of shit? Let's find out. Their names are:

(Announce Contestant names)

And with me, whether I like it or not, is the world's least useful assistant. He's always polymorphed for for 2 extra inches, but never adjusts his suit: it's Krudge the Unsummoned Familiar!

Krudge: Hello. I'm excited for tonight's show. There's a topic I wanted to bring to everyone's attention before we start the Loot Quest. Everyone is aware that discrimination is a problem. And naming specific types of discrimination can help bring attention to them. That's why I wanted to coin a term for an issue very close to my heart.

Turns as if to look directly into a camera

The number four is not just an underrated number. It's a lovely number. But we're never allowed four. For example, I wanted to have 4 contestants this year, but Davinia said that 4 is a number for freaky little a-holes. I didn't understand it then and I don't understand it now. But it led me to think that maybe we need a term for discrimination against the number four. And I suggest: Dys-four-ia.

Davinia: You know what? I stand by it. You are a freaky, little a-hole. Let's start the show. What do you have?

Krudge: If you thought the pun hurt, prepare yourself four some real pain. Our offering of power category this week is:

Loot Quest

  • The most overpowered weapon in your arsenal

Endeavor of Adequacy

(set in the the study)

  • Summon a spirit
    • using the summoning circle in the Arcane Study, chant, mutter, encant, or otherwise cast a summoning spell. Most bizarre spirit summoned wins.

Jaunt of Jeopardy

(Contestants are magically transported away from Varna Manor to an arena)

  • Choose a door at random (roll a d10)
    • Behind each door is one magical beast. Defeat it. If you are defeated, you will be disqualified.
      1. Wolpertinger
      2. Sphinx
      3. Bridge Troll
      4. Will-o'-the-Wisp
      5. Bigfoot
      6. Mandrake
      7. Grim Reaper
      8. Unicorn
      9. Gremlin
      10. Automaton

Sudden Quest

  • Bestow a new title upon Davinia. She will award the win to whichever pleases her most. Flattery is encouraged, but not required.
    • examples of Davinia's titles include, but are not limited to: Breaker of the Fourth Wall, Wielder of the Eldritch Tape Measure, Emcee Extraordinaire of The Eternal Award Ceremony, Warden of the Questing Wood, Archon of Amusing Errors, and Grand Secretary of the Unseen Scorecard